Fundamental Components of Personal Change

Below are what I call the Fundamental Components of Change.  I have never seen any person who has authentically made a substantial change in their life not grab hold of and fully implement each of the following principles.

Take Full Responsibility:
Other people’s actions may have helped you get to the place that you are at, but ultimately this is your life and you have to be the one to move it forward. You have to move to a position that enables you to take the necessary steps to change.
This is something we have to continually assess. Am I motivated?  One indicator of effective motivation is to assess what obstacles do we allow to stand in our way?  The more motivated a person is the fewer obstacles they allow to stand in their way.
Authenticity and Honesty:
This has to be one of the most important aspects of change. You have to be totally and completely 100% honest with yourself.  This includes the internal or external situation that you are looking to change and where you are at in regards to the steps of change. Sometimes there are layers that have to be peeled back before we reach a place of total authenticity. For some people and depending on the depth of the issue you are dealing with it can take a while to reach a place of total authenticity.  Honesty is a tool that we utilize to reach authenticity… and no real change occurs until we reach the place of authenticity.  I like to use the phrase ‘walk through with an open heart’… it is important to face the obstacles we face with an ‘open heart’.

The issue has to be addressed head on. This could mean internal confrontation with you, honest discussions with other people or a combination of both.
Though you do have to take responsibility and you are the one ultimately responsible for your change. There needs to be others involved in the process of change.  You should have at least one person if not two that you are 100% honest with about your current situation.  As the old saying goes….. man is not an island.

Long Term View:
Don’t get frustrated if it doesn’t happen overnight. Change takes time and some issues take much longer than others.  Every journey is different; some you have frequent trips and falls, some journeys seem to start slow before they gain steam, while others start fast then slow down towards the end.    Be patient try to have a long term view of things. Establish inside of yourself that you are going to overcome this problem.

It takes effort to change. You have to put for the requisite amount of effort into what you are trying to change.  Many people don’t change because they are not willing to put in the amount of effort it takes.  There is a point of decision that everyone must cross.  Change does not always feel good. It is not always comfortable and it is not always easy.

Internal: It can help to understand what the mindsets, mentalities or emotions that are hindering your movement forward and actively engage against it. Often internal strategies involve making active declarations against the negative mentality and replacing the negative mentality with a more productive one. Internal Redefinition: Many people have to redefine how they see themselves and their problems. I find that one of the most effective strategies of change is to actively engage in a redefinition of who you are.

External: External strategies are often part of the overall action needed to be taken. For example someone struggling with their weight may not keep ice cream around the house or go out to eat as much.  You may have to set up a meeting with an individual that you are having conflict with etc.

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